8/23/09

Death Makes You Think:: Are you prepared?

I've written the first line of this post about 20 times trying to make it come out eloquent... it just doesn't. It's raw and sad and really... Sunday's news hit me to the core. I usually prattle on over here about making life Pretty AND Organized, and having priorities together... today I'm the hippo sized hypocrite.

We found out at 9:45 Sunday in church that a close friend of our family died that morning. It was announced to our church congregation. The news leveled our little close knit community and pained our family. It was so unexpected... I just talked with him Friday. He was my sons Scout Master and had canceled the backpacking trip planed for the weekend. Sunday morning he was gone. I have a deep abiding faith about where he is and a knowledge that he WILL be together forever with his family... losing someone is hard but looking through an eternal perspective in Gods plan, I find comfort.

The hardest emotions today surrounded thoughts of his family. He was 36. He has a wonderful wife and 4 fantastic children with a much anticipated 5th child due in November. How will SHE do? How will SHE make it? I cried. I grieved. I prayed. Then I pondered.... am I prepared?

In this arena, no I fall short. I have a plot of dirt paid for... a family spot paid for over a hundred years ago. A will? Nope. Life Insurance?... not enough to raise 6 kids, just enough to cover the funeral. My affairs, as I expect many of ours are, are not settled.

I have a years supply of food storage... no joke. I can keep my family and neighbors from starving and I live frugally for sure. I'm well learned in gardening, sewing, home repairs, and many other homemaking activities that have helped me to prepare for an unstable future... but that isn't enough.

I'm a mom of 6 children.... and THAT is worth planning my future for.


Times are rough for everyone. Some have job loss and others have had a decrease in salaries... personally, we've lost 10% of our income this year. Still, priorities are always able to change. Life insurance and a plan for our future has become mine and I'll give up a lot for security and peace of mind in knowing that if tragedy struck our family, we'd weather the storm together without the worry of where to live or how to provide.


So how are you doing with planning for your future? Do you have enough insurance? Is your will in place? Are you willing to give up your regular trip to the nail salon or that fancy gym membership in order to make a plan for your family?
Photo Credits: Mom shirt Zazzle.com, LegalZoom.com


10 comments:

Mom in High Heels said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. He was my age! And his poor family. They must be devastated.
Fortunately, with M being in the military he is required to have a will, insurance, and really, a plan (he actually has a funeral plan), should something happen to him (always a strong possibility given his job), and because of that, I've made sure my stuff is taken care of too. I'm not insured for nearly as much as he is, but I have enough that it will help him out (paying for funeral costs, bills, etc) should something happen to me.
As the mom of 6, you absolutely need to have a plan in place. You need insurance, a will, a living will, and a plan of care for your children including temporary and permanent guardians.
My thoughts are with you and your friends.

Kathy @ Creative Home Expressions said...

Very sad news, and it is always something that stuns when it is someone young and in their prime. We had news of a death last week of someone my hubby worked with - cancer. Same age as my hubby. We have had wills since our first child; my hubby has had life insurance since he was 18. I have life insurance through my day job, but if I leave it's gone.

It is certainly something to consider and yet I know many parents who do not have wills yet. Anything can happen at any time - if you have kids get on with making a will.

Pam said...

I'm am deeply sorry to hear of the loss of your friend. It's never an easy thing to absorb. I also pray for son, since he lost his Scout Master.

Less than a year ago my husband and I both got life insurance. We got enough coverage that, financially, we would be in great shape, God forbid, a tragedy occur.

However, we still don't have a will made up. That needs to become a priority.

Maria said...

So sad for your loss and that of your community. What a blessing he must have been while physically among you. I believe he soul lives on...

I love this quote of C.S. Lewis and just posted about it yesterday... It's so simple, but says it all.
C.S. Lewis ~ A Beautiful Soul

On a personal note,
When I was in my 30's with young children...I had two "you have a mass" scares (first one on my breast, second on an ovary).
...after catching my breath with an immediate reminder of my physical mortality...
... I lost it again when I thought of how life would be for my family.

What would it cost to replace a wife and mother? THOUSANDS...
childcare, cooking, cleaning, laundry... you all know. So, we got a nice life insurance plan for me... and I felt better knowing that my husband would be able to afford maintaining our homelife.

The children are all grown and on their own... and still there are practical things that should be done at 54.
A poignant post today ... much food for thought ... prayers for your friend's family and your community * * *
All the best, as you seek The Best ~ Maria

Thoughtfully blended hearts said...

I have experienced this...life insurance is the only way you can survive. Social Security still pays for dependent children until they turn 18 or graduate high school. They also want anything you have saved for the dependent child returned to them. After that...nothing...no help with college or anything. I only had two children 7 and 15 yrs. old when their 42-yr.old Dad died.
Life insurance allowed me to pay off my house and car and then I got to go to college to get a BS degree. With SS, I could have never done any of this.
I don't want to scare all of you but facts are facts...make sure you have life insurance!!!

Jen - Balancing Beauty and Bedlam said...

Wow - the commentor above hits to the core. So sorry about your friend. My sis in law died at 34...life is short.

Practically speaking, life insurance is the best investment you never hope to use. Even with my hubby unemployed, this is something we would never drop..it has hit too close to home.

Ali said...

My thoughts run a similar course as yours. I am SO sad for Gina and the kids. I'm still crying for her this morning whenever I think of it! As yours, I found my thoughts turning towards thoughts of personal preparedness as well. Sure is a harsh reality to face.

Hugs & comfort from our family to yours,

Ali T.

Carrie said...

We have just supplemented our life insurance since we own two homes. If something happens to my husband, our homes will be paid off.

If something happens to me, my husband has enough money for child-care until they are all in school.

If something happens to one of my children, we have enough for a funeral. God forbid.

BUT. We don't have a will. It is next on our list. In our state, the children automatically go into foster care until a guardian can be set up in the family or not. The grandparents don't automatically get them. Scary. I think about it.every.time we leave the house together. EVERY TIME. Thanks for the reminder.

NoExpertsNeeded said...

I'm not sure how I landed on your site, but I guess your first line was enough to keep me reading. I join in sending my thoughts and prayers for your loss.

We tend to relate the level of death's tragedy with age. Yes, 36 is way too young. But death (at any age) hits hard on our heart.

From the amazing events of my Dad's passing, I learned that having THAT conversation (and I mean the deathbed talk) now -- before it's too late -- makes a world of difference as you shuffle through the grieving stages.

Now, as I've become a poster child of sorts, I share my Dad's story to remind people to have 'the talk'. Today. With all loved ones. Because if you don't, well, living with regret is not what you want.

To read my Dad's deathbed story, please sign up for a free book download: www.noexpertsneeded.com
(Truly, there are no strings attached...this you can believe.)

...Simply my way of giving back...

take care,
Louise Lewis, author
No Experts Needed: The Meaning of Life According to You!

TacoHead said...

Very sad. You are right about being prepared though. I had no idea how easy the process was until I created my lat will and testament online with www.DocBuilder.com. In any event, I bet his family is devastated. It is never an easy thing to take.

 
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